I was born to a poor sharecropper family in Mississippi. I left home
at the age of twelve to make it as a dancer in New York City in a
revival of the musical "Ethel the Aardvark Goes Quantity
Surveying," but the play closed two nights before it opened.
I was lucky enough to get a scholorship to the prestigious "Uncle
Phil's School of Carnie" where I spent two grueling weeks earning
a degree in Tilt-A-Whirl maintence and operation. After an internship
with the "Fun-Time Traveling Fair and Gun Show," I became the full
time Tilt-A-Whirl operator, a position I held for six years.
When the fair no longer could afford the duct tape to keep the
operational, I quit and acquired the position of Janitorial Assistant
in Charge of Sewage at WFAK radio in Moose Lick, Montana. I got my
big break when the station's record player needle broke at 2:12 a.m.
during an all Polka marathan, and I filled the time with Howard
Stern-like shock jock antics. That led to a lucrative morning show at
WJOK radio in Cowtip, Oklahoma, but the station closed down shortly
after due to a bubonic plague scare.
I was hitchhiking to Florida but ran out of money in middle Georgia,
where I acquired the job as host of the "Sunday Night Ride" on
Y96. The rest, as they say, is